Chapter Four: Choosing a Beautiful Class Vice President for Myself

For the sake of my own safety, there was no way I was going to open the door. I waited until I was sure all was quiet outside before I relaxed. Just as I was about to lie down, a soft sobbing drifted in from the living room.

I quietly turned the doorknob and opened the door a crack. There was Yan Yan, curled up on the sofa, weeping, while my lovely mother sat calmly, watching TV and nibbling on braised rabbit.

Seeing my little sister cry made me feel wretched. Maybe my inability to bear seeing girls cry started with her.

I slipped out and went to her side, patting her shoulder. “Don’t cry. If it makes you feel better, I’ll never eat rabbit again, alright?”

“But bunnies are so cute, why do you all have to eat them?” she whimpered.

I really couldn’t argue with that, even though she never said a word when it came to pork, beef, lamb, fish, or shrimp—in fact, she ate more than anyone.

“Funny, you seemed to be enjoying it just a moment ago,” my mother, Ren Xue, interjected.

“Ahh—bunnies!” Yan Yan sobbed even harder.

I shot my mother a sharp look. “She’s already crying so hard, and you had to make it worse.”

Ren Xue shrugged. “Oh, please. Girls cry all the time—most of the time, it’s just an act. A good smack would sort her out.”

“Slap!” I smacked Yan Yan lightly on the cheek. “Alright, your wish is my command.”

“Yan Ruyu! How dare you hit me!” Yan Yan was immediately up in arms, launching herself at me in mock vengeance.

Looking closer, I saw there wasn’t a single tear on her face. Leave it to a mother to understand her own daughter best.

Yan Yan quickly settled down, though the price I paid was a series of bruises along my waist.

My mother saw me grimacing and came over to give me a whack on the head. “Honestly, you can’t keep spoiling her like this—you’ll ruin her.”

“I’m fine. I’ll be back to normal in a couple of days. After all, didn’t I learn it all from you and Dad?” I replied, not hiding my meaning.

Just as I finished, my mother twisted my waist again. “You’re getting bolder, daring to talk back to your own mother.”

I quickly raised my hands in surrender, apologizing until she was mollified.

After a short rest, it was time to head back to school. As class monitor, I had to set a good example, so I made sure to arrive with a full minute to spare.

To my surprise, I was actually the last one there—Liu Xiaojie was already standing at the podium.

Just as I was considering whether to greet the teacher since class hadn’t started yet, Liu Xiaojie spoke up. “You have one class period—afterwards, bring your chosen class officers to my office. I’ll give the final approval.”

So, after taking only two steps toward my seat, I turned right around and headed for the podium. Liu Xiaojie closed the door and left.

“Good afternoon, everyone. Allow me to introduce myself again. My surname is Yan, my given name is Ruyu, Han ethnicity, male, and my hobby is girls.” I paused for effect.

Most of the class, expecting a show from their newly appointed class monitor, quickly caught on, the corners of their mouths twitching.

“For now, I’ll be acting as the class monitor for Class 33, Grade 10. Why ‘for now’? Well, to be honest, I’m too lazy for this job. Even though I was appointed monitor because I’m so handsome, I know I’m not cut out for this. Maybe in a few days, I’ll shave my head, and when the teacher thinks I’m no longer handsome, they’ll pick someone else.”

“Being too good-looking really is a burden,” I added with a melancholy air.

“What brazen shamelessness,” Ma Liang chimed in, right on cue.

The class burst out laughing.

“Alright, enough nonsense. Let’s get to picking our class officers. With military training coming up, we need a PE representative. The requirements are simple: enjoy sports, be tough, able to fight, and willing to stand up for classmates. Anyone interested, raise your hand.”

“I am!” “Me!” Before anyone else could react, two hands shot up—Ma Liang, ever the show-off, and Kang Qiaoyue, sporting a boyish crop.

“Anyone else willing to take on the challenge of protecting the whole class?” I asked again. No one else volunteered; maybe they were eyeing other positions or just not interested in being class officers.

“Alright, then. Ladies first—let’s have Kang Qiaoyue come up and give her campaign speech. Applause, please!”

Thunderous clapping greeted Kang Qiaoyue as she strode to the podium.

She cleared her throat. “Hello, everyone. I’m Kang Qiaoyue. You’ve already heard my introduction today. I love sports, especially basketball, and I’ve been in more than a few fights. Who says girls aren’t as good as boys? Elect me as sports rep, and I’ll have your back.” Her words brimmed with swagger.

“Wow, so cool! My heart’s fluttering—I vote for you!” a girl in the second row declared, clearly smitten.

With that one line—“Who says girls aren’t as good as boys?”—Kang Qiaoyue instantly won over all the girls in class. From the looks of things, she was about to be elevated straight to the top as an outstanding sports rep.

“Oh, and I forgot to mention—I’m the city’s youth amateur Sanda champion.” She finished her speech with a flourish and stepped down.

“How impressive!” “She’s definitely the right choice.” “So strong!”

“Alright, quiet down, everyone. Now let’s welcome Ma Liang for his campaign speech. Applause, please!” I called out.

A smattering of applause followed as Ma Liang marched up to the podium, running his hand nervously through his hair.

“Hi, everyone. I’m Ma Liang. I originally wanted to run for sports rep, to be the class’s knight in shining armor, but after hearing how amazing Kang Qiaoyue is, it looks like that job isn’t for me.”

He paused, then added, “Not much else to say—big boss, I’m counting on you to protect us.”

Kang Qiaoyue was taken aback by his sudden withdrawal but just waved it off. “No problem—anyone in our class is under my protection.”

I shot Ma Liang a curious glance, then realized he’d seen the writing on the wall—there was no way to outdo Kang Qiaoyue’s Sanda championship, so better to bow out gracefully and earn some goodwill.

I had a good impression of Ma Liang—he knew how to handle himself.

“Anyone else for sports rep? If not, then Kang Qiaoyue is officially our class rep.” Everyone looked around—no objections.

“Congratulations, Kang Qiaoyue, on becoming our class’s big boss. The honor of guarding Class 33 is yours.”

With my final word, Kang Qiaoyue rose and gave a bow to the class.

Amid enthusiastic applause, she was officially appointed as the PE representative for Class 33.

Originally, I’d planned for each candidate to give a speech, then let the class vote. But things didn’t go as expected, not just for PE rep, but for the other positions as well.

For example, when it came time for the arts and entertainment rep, there wasn’t even a contest—everyone unanimously nominated the beautiful Li Kexin, who could sing, dance, and play the guzheng. She accepted their support graciously, promising to work hard and not let them down.

When it came to academic rep, everyone insisted the top student should take the role. I immediately objected, since I was top of the class. To avoid the position, I made an impassioned speech about fairness and effort, and in the end, the class elected Zhang Heng and Duan Yanyan, both strong students with a will to work hard.

The labor rep—arguably the toughest job—was foisted on the unlucky Ma Liang. He seemed happy enough to have a class officer position, little realizing it was the hardest and most thankless one of all.

Then it hit me—why not elect a vice monitor? That way, I could delegate everything and have nothing to do!

“So, let's start the election for vice monitor. I’ll be honest—I’m pretty lazy and don’t want to manage anything. Whoever is elected will basically handle everything, and once I retire, the vice monitor will take over. If you’re interested, speak up—even those who’ve run for other positions can join in, as long as you don’t mind the workload.” As I finished, I felt freedom was within reach.

“I’m out. I think Yan Ruyu’s organizational skills are great,” said the arts and entertainment rep. Many agreed.

“I’m not running. You do it,” Ma Liang added, to a chorus of playful boos.

My classmates refused my suggestion outright.

Seeing things weren’t going my way, I said, “Since you all believe in me, I’ll do my best as class monitor. However, since I can’t do everything myself, let’s at least elect someone to help me.”

With reason on my side, everyone finally agreed. Honestly, it didn’t matter to me—once we had a vice monitor, I’d dump everything on them. When the teacher saw how diligent they were, I could gracefully step aside.

Lazy people need to be clever. Without a few tricks, you end up toiling away, when you could be living easy, with time to do whatever you please.

In the end, after much discussion, Li Kexin was chosen as both arts and entertainment rep and vice monitor.

So I left the selection of the remaining life rep and league secretary to Li Kexin, calling it ‘extra practice’ for her.

As for me, I slipped back to my seat, mission accomplished, my achievements hidden behind a modest retreat.