Chapter 45: Pulled a muscle...

Jiang Luan's words were truly unjust to Qi Shaolin.

No matter how agile one's footwork or how formidable one's martial arts might be, it was impossible to guard against a sudden slip of the foot.

Climbing out of the water with his outer garments completely soaked and plastered tightly against his skin, it would be entirely inappropriate for Qi Shaolin to go chasing after Ruibao in such a state.

Jiang Luan had no choice but to say, "Forget it, you might as well just soak here."

The natural hot spring water here had a brownish-tea hue, and when someone soaked in it, only their upper body remained exposed, which made Jiang Luan not overly concerned about modesty...

Besides, damn it all, they were both men; why on earth should he feel any modesty?

Jiang Luan constantly had to remind himself to be on guard against the possibility of being assimilated by this world.

Step one was to firmly establish his persona as a bold, mature, and seasoned man.

Therefore, Jiang Luan washed his feet in the hot spring just like an old man, extending one leg out to pick up a flat stone and scrub away the dead skin on his heel.

"..."

Seeing Jiang Luan uninhibitedly stretching out his fair, tender calf right in front of him, Qi Shaolin wondered if the man was trying to seduce him.

Consequently, a fierce internal battle instantly erupted within Qi Shaolin's mind.

......

......

The distant mountains connected with the sky, and the ink-black clouds rolled overhead.

A silver river resembling a jade belt spanned the long night, and a sky full of stars scattered across the lake, shimmering and reflecting the twinkling fireflies.

Thus, amidst such fine scenery and a lovely night...

Unromantically scraping the dead skin off his feet, Jiang Luan discussed the mundane matters of eating, drinking, shitting, and sleeping with Qi Shaolin:

"Brother Lin, what are your plans for the future?"

Qi Shaolin: "??"

Seeing Qi Shaolin's blank expression, Jiang Luan had no choice but to explain, "When the family property is divided in the future, where do you plan to settle down?"

Jiang Luan had considered that cutting off Prince Suoping's arm this time meant he had officially drawn a hard line against the Lich King.

However, wanting to overthrow the Lich King made his status as a prince a massive obstacle.

Today in the magistrate's court, anyone with discerning eyes could tell that the mastermind behind Huazhao was someone else. If Jiang Junyu had continued his investigation, the outcome would certainly have been different.

Yet Jiang Junyu, who was famously impartial and ruthless even toward his own nephew, fell silent after Huazhao was brought to justice.

Even City Lord Jiang dared not easily move against Prince Suoping; ordinary charges were likely no longer enough to shake him.

Who else was left to punish him? The Emperor?

To Jiang Luan at this moment, that was nothing short of a pipe dream.

Therefore, the current expedient measure was to find a way to separate households from Prince Suoping, which was far better than holing up in a dangerous environment while being watched like a tiger eyeing its prey.

Looking utterly perplexed, Qi Shaolin replied as a matter of course, "Naturally, wherever my wife is, that is where Lin'er will be."

It was precisely the answer Jiang Luan had expected.

Leaning lazily against a rock with his arms spread out, Jiang Luan daydreamed about the future, "Green Water Islet is not bad. Once we save up enough money by then, we can remodel that eatery and build a few small houses at the foot of the mountain..."

Hearing the word "we" filled Qi Shaolin with boundless warmth and comfort.

Unable to help himself, he let out a low chuckle, "By then, we can also raise a dog."

"What's the point of raising a dog?" Jiang Luan asked in confusion, "I already have..."

Qi Shaolin: "??"

Jiang Luan had almost blurted out that he was already raising Qi Shaolin like a large dog. Catching himself just in time, he pivoted his words, "Raising a dog isn't as good as raising children; at least they can look after us and provide for our old age in the future."

Qi Shaolin: "..."

Unbeknownst to Jiang Luan, the casual nonsense he blurted out was sending all the wrong signals to Qi Shaolin.

Thinking that the person before him not only wanted to give him a home but also children of their own, Qi Shaolin was instantly overcome with emotion.

Involuntarily drawing closer to Jiang Luan, he asked in a low voice, "Wife, do you prefer a son or a daughter?"

Qi Shaolin originally assumed that, given Jiang Luan's temperament, he would surely remain completely neutral and say something like, "I like both sons and daughters equally."

Who would have thought that Jiang Luan refused to play by conventional rules and answered decisively, "A daughter, it has to be a daughter! Daughters are their parents' intimate little padded jackets, they're the cutest!"

Hearing this, Qi Shaolin nodded in agreement as well, "Daughters are very fine. When she grows up, she will take after you—she will be beautiful."

Failing to grasp the implication of how a daughter would end up looking like him, Jiang Luan was still earnestly debating the previous question, "Actually, it would be best to have both a son and a daughter. The more children in the house, the livelier it is."

Jiang Luan was already accustomed to the environment of the orphanage, and coupled with an innate fear of loneliness in his nature, naturally, the more family members, the better.

Yet this remark of his sent yet another erroneous signal to Qi Shaolin.

The more children, the better... Qi Shaolin lowered his head in deep thought, wondering if it was too late to start making them right now.

Thus, the look Qi Shaolin gave Jiang Luan as he raised his head carried a rather profound and meaningful weight.

Oblivious to the danger he was in, Jiang Luan was still fussing over the child issue, "But with too many children, education becomes a problem. The older kids have to take care of the younger ones, which inevitably leads to neglect on one side. A bunch of boys clustered together always love to fight, so girls are definitely better..."

While Jiang Luan was worrying excessively about the future, Qi Shaolin had already silently closed the distance to his side.

"Wife," Qi Shaolin rubbed his chin against Jiang Luan's shoulder like a spoiled child, "shall we start making one right now?"

"..." Jiang Luan froze. "Make... make what?"

"A little baby, of course," Qi Shaolin said. "Aunt Wang was spouting complete nonsense earlier; you simply can't make a baby just by sleeping together!"

Never expecting Qi Shaolin to make such a startling statement, Jiang Luan instantly sensed a trace of danger. "Wait a minute..."

"It has to be like the illustrations in the picture album..." As he spoke, Qi Shaolin wrapped his arms around Jiang Luan from the side and lowered his head to kiss his neck.

In truth, the moment Qi Shaolin spoke those words, Jiang Luan realized things were going south and turned to bolt.

Alas, they were in a hot spring, and their footing was entirely composed of slippery cobblestones.

It would have been fine if Jiang Luan had stayed still, but making a dash for it caused him to replicate the exact mishap Qi Shaolin had experienced earlier—only far worse. With a slip of his foot, he split his legs apart in a painful split.

Before Qi Shaolin could even touch Jiang Luan, he hadn't expected such a drastic reaction and hurriedly reached out to grab him.

"Ouch! It hurts! It hurts!" Jiang Luan howled in absolute agony. "Don't touch me!"

Pulling Jiang Luan upright, Qi Shaolin didn't dare touch him further, feeling terribly remorseful for his previous hooligan-like behavior.

He carefully observed Jiang Luan's complexion. "Wife... are you all right?"

Jiang Luan's face had turned green from the pain, and he said with a trembling voice, "I pulled my groin..."

Qi Shaolin: "..."

A complex expression instantly washed over Qi Shaolin's face, completely at a loss for how to comfort Jiang Luan.

Inwardly, Jiang Luan was wailing in despair:

Good heavens, I was merely taking a hot spring bath; am I about to be turned into a eunuch?

The two of them stood there in awkward silence.

Daring not to move, Jiang Luan clamped his legs together and waited for a while, but the pain refused to subside.

With a burning, scorching ache lingering between his legs, Jiang Luan couldn't help but pound the ground with his fist in an attempt to distract himself from the pain.

Finding it truly unbearable to watch, Qi Shaolin grasped Jiang Luan's hand to halt his self-destructive behavior. "Let me take a look for you."

"Look at your head!" Jiang Luan leaped up on one foot. "You are not allowed to look!"

Paying him no mind whatsoever, Qi Shaolin forcefully scooped Jiang Luan up and carried him onto the bank.

The high temperature of the hot spring water was indeed detrimental to the injury... The moment he left the water, Jiang Luan felt the temperature drop instantly, offering a much-needed sense of relief.

Yet, damn it all... Jiang Luan covered his face. He was still stark naked!

Clearly, Qi Shaolin had not anticipated that Jiang Luan would be so uninhibited as to bathe in the hot spring without a single thread on.

However, at this moment, Qi Shaolin only cared about Jiang Luan's injury and had no spare capacity for other thoughts.

He immediately rounded the other side of the rock wall and fished something out from his stacked garments.

"What's wrong?" Zuo Lang asked from within the water.
Having waited in the hot spring all this time, he felt like he was about to turn into a soggy sponge.

Dismissing him, Qi Shaolin said, "Your master was abducted by a monkey. Go hurry up and take him a change of clothes."

"Oh." Hearing this, Zuo Lang fished out a dry set of clothes and immediately set off.

Suddenly, a wave of suspicion hit him, and he turned his head back, only to find that Qi Shaolin's retreating figure had already vanished behind the rock wall.

Zuo Lang furrowed his brows slightly.

How did Young Master Qi know about the master-disciple relationship between him and Ruibao? Was it Jiang Luan who told him?

Meanwhile, Jiang Luan was crawling across the ground with a trembling body.

Intending to find some clothes to put on, he was suddenly grabbed by both ankles.

Just as Jiang Luan was about to scream out, a wave of soothing, cooling relief washed over the injured area, easing the pain.

"Hiss..." Jiang Luan stopped struggling.

Applying ointment to his hands, Qi Shaolin massaged the injured spot for Jiang Luan. "Wife, do you feel a bit better?"

Lying flat on the ground motionless, Jiang Luan was practically indistinguishable from a salted fish.

Receiving no response, Qi Shaolin grew somewhat nervous and wanted to flip Jiang Luan over to check his expression.

The human "salted fish" shifted slightly, buried his face against the dirt, and muttered weakly, "Not bad."

Too ashamed to look at Qi Shaolin anymore, Jiang Luan simply allowed the other man to apply medicine to him, utterly incapable of refusing.

Interpreting that soft murmur as permission to continue, Qi Shaolin pressed on with renewed dedication, wholeheartedly massaging Jiang Luan's afflicted area.

Yet, as the medicinal application went on, things began to take a rather strange turn.

Not only did Jiang Luan stop feeling any pain, but he even started to find it a bit overly comfortable.

Half-closing his eyes in enjoyment, he felt the blood and qi surging downward through his entire body, and a certain part felt uncomfortably suppressed... Something was terribly wrong.

"Wait!" Realizing what was happening, Jiang Luan shouted aloud to stop Qi Shaolin.

Assuming Jiang Luan was hurt somewhere else, Qi Shaolin hurriedly flipped him back over. "What is it, Wife?"

"Stop! Cease fire!" Jiang Luan executed a double-hit roar.

But it was already too late.

The moment Qi Shaolin's hand brushed against his body, Jiang Luan knew disaster had struck, and he simply couldn't hold it back anymore...

Qi Shaolin: "..."

Splattered all over, Qi Shaolin froze in place, utterly dumbfounded.

Directly confronting this social-death scene, Jiang Luan parted his legs and offered an awkward smile, "I suppose I've been holding it in for too long... My apologies, brother."

With his face and clothes covered in the mess, Qi Shaolin knelt on one knee before Jiang Luan, expressionless.

"I... should I help you wipe it off?"

Muttering softly, Jiang Luan reached out, hoping to erase the "criminal evidence" from the young man's face.

Yet to Qi Shaolin, this gesture was undoubtedly an embrace of submission.

Catching Jiang Luan's outstretched hand, Qi Shaolin tilted his head, gazing innocently at him, "Lin'er is covered all over in Wife's scent."

Jiang Luan: "..."

A steaming, sulfurous volcanic natural hot spring... Could it truly be capable of steaming a person half to death?

Dazed for a brief moment, Jiang Luan flushed bright red from head to toe once the words registered.

"You! What—what did you say?" Jiang Luan stammered.

Damn it all!

Was his own mind just that filthy?! So that wasn't what he meant at all, right?!

Gazing steadily at Jiang Luan with clear, limpid eyes, Qi Shaolin raised his hand to wipe the silver thread from his face and popped it straight into his mouth.

Jiang Luan: "..."

This was going to be the death of him!

So who the hell was trying to seduce whom right now?!